25 weeks

This week, Baby is the size of a:
Cauliflower  13.6 - 14.8 inches, 1.5 - 2.5 pounds

How far along? 
25 weeks 

Total weight gain/loss: 
15 pounds gained (eek!)

Maternity clothes? 

Yes.     

Sleep: 
So much has been happening at work and in our personal lives that I fall to sleep quickly these days and stay asleep for the most part but I wake up early usually with my mind on whatever it is I have to tackle that day.

Best moment this week: 

Daddy got a job offer in Chicago and we are moving!  The worst moment...realizing that you may never see the room we decorated for you.  It's sitting painted, with new furniture and a beautiful hot pink chandelier and these gorgeous lanterns but I don't know you will see it. 

 Movement:  

I feel you move multiple times daily and you have started to hiccup just like Maddie did when she was in my belly.  As a matter of fact you have the hiccups as I type this and my belly keeps jolting.

Food cravings: 
Brownies.  Hot wings.

Symptoms: 
I'm feeling great but have a lot of anxiety over being six months pregnant and not knowing what will happen with the sell of our house and where we will live in Chicago.

Dr. Appts:
Just had an appointment and the Dr. said you are doing great and that your heart sounds great!

 Gender: 

I am getting more and more excited to have two girls.  I can't wait to meet you.

Labor Signs:   
Nothing

Belly Button in or out? 
Still getting bigger!  Maddie still loves sticking her finger in it.  She beats on my belly too and points to baby ducky, sometimes kissing it.

Feeling toward Pregnancy: 
Blessed.  Simply, blessed.  No matter what we face in these next few months, it means so much to have my girls with me.

What I miss: 
Nothing. 

What I am looking forward to: 
Meeting you.  Loving you and settling down in a new home with you.  Agreeing on a name for you!  Daddy and I can't agree on a name and it's killing me!  I love Ella and he likes Macy and Piper.

Milestones: 

25 weeks and feeling great.  Daddy has a new job and I am so happy for him.

Always remember one thing, I love you. - Mama

Life as we know it

Life as we know it is changing.  Jamie accepted a new job this week and we are moving to Chicago.  That one sentence encompasses so many hurdles we must jump over to get our family living together one day.  Before kids I would have been so excited and eager for the transition to a new city but with a 20 month old and being 6 months pregnant; I fear for what's ahead.  Jamie will be commuting from St. Louis to Chicago for the first few months.  That means that my partner and my support will be away every week from Monday through Friday.  I have an entire four bedroom house to get on the market which includes a lengthy checklist of items to repair before the house can be listed.  I am fearful of the showings, especially with a 20 month old.  I am fearful of having to get a toddler out the door by 6:30 each morning and having the house ready to show before I leave in case someone wants to see it.  I'm worried about the stress of caring for a 20 month old on my own five days a week.  I am worried that as I grow bigger and have less energy and patience that this will be more and more difficult.  I don't have a real say in whether I stay or go in the beginning.  My husband has decided that I should earn my paycheck back home while I can and also use up the maternity leave that I have owed to me.  To me, my family being together and the stress of this is more important.  I would rather have my family all move up to Chicago and situated before the baby comes.  I've said it but it falls on deaf ears.  I mentioned how hard this is going to be on me but it seems lost on him.  I mentioned that I need a cleaning person at least once a month to assist with actually cleaning the house since I will be primarily focused on picking up the house after our daughter destroys it nightly.  He told me that we need to conserve where we can.  I am insulted.  I have taken the liberty of looking into a baby nurse as it seems I will be staying behind to have a baby and take care of it by myself too on weekdays.  I won't hear anything objections on this.  He knows better, too.  I can't imagine how hard it's going to be moving with a 4-6 week old and a toddler with no day care in the new city to take care of my girls while I try to get a house in order. My husbands sister who I am not that close with actually hugged me and apologized for what i am about to go through and told me that she didn't feel my husband understood what I was about to go through.  I think he actually has it easy, living in the new city and coming home only on weekends.  I told him that and he acted as though I was crazy.

I feel like I live back in some ancient time where my duty is to take care of the home, produce babies and earn a paycheck.  I feel I don't have a say and I feel these next six months are going to be anything but idealistic.  I have a babies room that is 3/4's complete that I don't know if my baby will ever see.  If the house sells before my baby is born she won't.

I have zero family.  I have zero support system.  I don't know if I can do this.